Author: stacxdomner
Talk to me sometimes …
As an introvert person, all of my friends would know this, I tend to write and express a lot more on social media than I do outside. Sometimes, I do not even say a word while I am meeting with friends, not because I do not want to, but that is my personality in which I love to listen more. If you ask me whether which one represents the real me, online or offline? I would say offline because to be honest my activities on social medias are not really the natural me because I am actually not that talkative. But if you choose to judge me based on my life on those platforms, I don’t have any right to stop your opinions because it is true that I do that and I might have made a mistake of being that way. Admittedly, I am not a perfect person. I have made countless mistakes in life and surely I am going to make more in the future. However, I hope the upcoming ones will not be the same as the last ones. I will not deny any of my flaws that people would have talked about me. Yet, what I truly wish for is that they should have met and talked with me outside before they had ideas of me.
“Does Life Have a Happy Ending?”
“The problem with happy endings is that they’re either not really happy, or not really endings, you know? In real life, some things get better and some things get worse. And then eventually you die.” – John Green
Happy endings might have fooled you to favor the terms. But we tend to forget that the ending of all of us is death which is not what we really want, ironically. So I don’t think we should wish for a happy ending of our life; however, we should wish for the best moment we are living in. It is inevitably true that life consists of both ups and downs, which sometimes things get better, and sometimes they get worse. The question is what we should be doing within these situations.
I would say if good things happen, let’s celebrate and enjoy it. For example, you had applied for a job, and then you were called for an interview. After the interview, the company decided to offer you the position you’d applied for with a great salary, so for this amazing to have occurred, you should tell your family, friends and lovers, and throw a big party together. Sometimes, this moment might never return the second time in your life, who knows?
On the other hand, when you face obstacles in life which bring you down, you should accept and learn from your mistakes. Why do you have to welcome the problems? It’s because they have already existed in your life. You can’t go back in time in order to change what happened, can you? So you don’t have choice, but undertake them. In addition to this acceptance, you should carefully investigate the root causes of your mistakes and thoroughly learn from them, so that you can avoid their repetition in the future.
Unless you really want to die, I don’t think life has a happy ending because death is our ending, and it tears us apart from people whom we love and things that we own. Nobody wants to lose those parts of us even though we really know that we will one day. To me, there is no perfect life in the universe because life is full of countless perfect imperfections; thus, I have never thought that I will be able to possess a so-called perfect life or a happy ending of it. That’s why I always live my life for the moment.
“Late Night Thought”
It’s night time again, and I don’t feel that I have had enough of today. I woke up at around 9am this morning, which was later than usual because last night I had been playing games until very late before I had gone to sleep. After I finished my shower, I repeated my routine, having breakfast, checking news on my Facebook and Instagram, and then reading stuff.
I have been kind of anxious because of the chaos formed by the epidemic of COVID-19, so reading is one of the techniques I have been trying doing to ease my mental health. Currently, I spend most of my free time on reading Maybe series, consisting of three novels, by Colleen Hoover. I honestly feel better when reading books these days because I tend to forget about what is really happening around me.
Also, due to the fact that my working schedule isn’t busy, I have time to restart my blogging, yet this time I put more focus on random journal writing. The fact that I have not been able to travel means I have got nothing new to write about too. It is one side effect of the outspread. Anyway, the journal section covers what is going my mind on my daily basic that inspires me, and I don’t really care about the topic or category.
To be honest, I haven’t had any specific genre on my mind, but I clearly know that writing is one of my passions which I would like develop when I am older. My dream is to become one of well-known authors in the world, which is too big for me. I know, yet I don’t care because I like to expect for the best, and I believe this ambition will guide me through any possible paths I could take in the future to reach that point.
By the way, I think I got to go now because staying late again might get me sick tomorrow which is my working day. Having sickness is the last thing I want to see during this season because not being able to go away has stressed out a lot, especially my plan to continue my master degree. It has been put on halt, and it is highly likely that I will have to defer my study into next year intake because my university country’s border has still been closed and my VISA process remains silent at the embassy.
Even though how much this pisses me off, I can’t do nothing, but just keep calm and wait. I hope everything will be back to normal as soon as possible, so I can resume all operations of my life goals. Moreover, I hope my family, my friends and I can get through within good health.
Take care you all, night!
“The 1st Quote in Maybe Now”
After reading a few chapters of Maybe Now by Colleen Hoover, I noticed a beautifully meaningful quote from the novel. It says “It was hard falling in love with someone who was committed to someone else. It was even harder trying to prevent it from happening.”
This is probably one of the most moving quotes I have even read through my life. Coming through this bitter-sweet reality of wording makes me feel like I am having a box of chocolate in the morning right after I brush my teeth, and I can feel its taste on the top of my tongue early of the day. In fact, there can be at least implications from the quote, basing on readers’ experiences.
If you read the quote for the first time, you will see the unpleasant part of the line which reminds of many people out there who are dreadfully falling in love with a person who has already been in a relationship with somebody else. Their existence might not even be seen by the person they cherish, or even if the person is aware of their intention, he or she might not care because all commitment and attention are paid to someone else whom he or she treasures the most.
This is insanely hurtful, yet the question is how this could possibly happen. Just like what you all might have repeatedly heard from people saying that love is blind and unconditional. It really is. In my view, I believe people tend to fall in love without having purposes to love. It is just a moment when their heart opens its door to save that person’s identity and develop a crush on him or her immediately. Thus, this natural occurrence of sentimentality is practically far beyond what we, as human beings, are capable of reaching to prevent it from happening.
In contrast, if you have read the book, you would clearly comprehend the actual cause of its situation. The utterance of the quote was just made due to the feelings of discomfort and jealousy from a girlfriend of a man who had texted with his ex-girlfriend about a little thing. The man doesn’t cheat on the girlfriend because they’ve all known that it was just a friendship-related conversation right there. No matter what, the circumstance here would truly be weird and let the girlfriend feel like she is just a third wheel.
Actually, the man was also aware of his girlfriend’s concern, so he decided to clarify and make things right back on track by asking her right to the point of how she felt about the text. After they talked, his assurance has made her awful mood fade away, and they clearly know that what really matters now is they love each other.
To sum up, I personally think that sad-looking quotes or words don’t always come from a broken person, but they might have been stated by in-love people who are mistakenly and temporarily confused by their own hypothesis. Yet, it isn’t their fault to have felt that way because this is love, and love comes with all sorts of feelings. To love right, like the people in the book do, I believe that discussion, clarification and reassurance are always needed because they show you care about each other.
“The First Quarter of 2020”
2020 doesn’t turn out to be the year that everyone wanted it to be. Outspokenly, the first quarter of the year was completely sucked because of the widespread of Coronavirus, and the rest is full of uncertainty. We don’t know when it will be passed, or when we will have the vaccine or cure of it.
Seeing the news updated on TVs and social medias, people have been soaked with anxiety, worrying about ourselves and family who might be unconsciously infected with the virus. I am one of the examples. Recently, I have been really stressed of the situation in which I have fallen and challenged. This has irritated my own work and study too because I can’t concentrate well on the tasks.
Even though I am currently working through online platform, still I am required to travel to my office as it is the place where I have to complete my duty as a teacher. Thus, I must be really watchful and always keep an eye on my personal practice of hygiene, in which I frequently wash my hands with sanitizer or alcohol. Plus, I also wear surgical mask whenever I am outside of my home to reduce the risk of bringing bad luck back.
Besides, there is a good thing that my parents and my sister have stayed home since the government decided to closed down all public and private educational institutions halting all forms of physical classrooms. In term of proactive prevention strategy, I do really appreciate this effort from government as it supports social distancing which is the most powerful way to slow down the number of infections.
Having tried all my best to prevent myself from this severe virus, I hope that I can increase the extent of my family members’ safety. Moreover, I hope we all will go through this hard time together.
“Unexpected Lesson”
Have you ever been amazed of the outcomes of an unexpected decision which you were hesitated to make? A part of you did not want to do it, but then something pushed you so hard to let it happen.
One day in 2017, I was on a cycling excursion from Phnom Penh to Koh Kong province with a group of my friends. It was approximately 280-kilometer riding trip that would normally take just around five to six hours to get there if I used car or bus. Unfortunately, my transport was a bike. You know what, I had never had any experiences on biking for that long distance before or even ridden bike as my daily routine.
At first I thought that I was not physically strong enough for that tough task though, so I was really frightened that I would not be able to make it to our destination. But then, I didn’t know what pushed me to the point that I eventually decided to take the challenge, from which I might have regretted if I did not because, after all, I realized that the trip taught me a useful lesson in life.
It is true that I was not a well-trained cyclist, so how could I manage to cycle with my friends throughout the trip? Admittedly it was not an easy journey at all because the distance was around 170 miles and the road conditions were bumpy and hilly at some points. Plus, it would take us a few days to get to Koh Kong province. However, even though there were obstacles, we believed that it was not impossible as well.
On our trip, we had to set out clear goal for each day, so that we had a sense of direction where we were heading for. This decision was made because we all understood that doing the job step by step is the only choice we could bring about the achievement. This means we were riding around 100 kilometers a day. More importantly, we would not have stopped if, by the end of the day, we had not reached the point yet, which was our resilient commitment.
Moreover, there were times when my journey was going within difficulties. At that time, I remember cycling in the dark cycling until 7 or 8 o’clock, so I could barely see the way as there were not any lights alongside of the road. Plus, the road itself was extremely hilly, and some parts of it were under constructions, so my bike and I were going up and down repeatedly. At one point when I was going down from the top of the mountain, I was not carefully holding the brakes, which let my bike going down speedily. Then, suddenly my front wheel hit a deep pothole really strongly as I had not been aware of it. Not being able to control the situation, I was shocked and terribly fell off the bike.
My arms and knees were badly cut, but I could not see it because of the darkness. When I touched those parts of my body, I felt the wetness of my blood dripped out of the surface of my clothes. It hurt so much, yet I was thankful that I was still laying alive on the road. Swiftly, I rose up from the ground, brushed the dust out of myself, and picked my bike up right at time when my friends came. Despite the facts that I got some injuries, and my bike’s neck was bended in an unusual way, I still keep on moving forward because we were still 5 kilometers away from our pinned point yet.
During the time when I was riding for the rest of that day, I started to think about myself. What had just happened was not different to what always does to the reality in my daily life. It is virtually inevitable that life has ups and downs. While sometimes I am happy, the other times I am upset due to impacts of the circumstances I am living in.
For me, based on this unforgettable riding experience, I have learned that whether I stay in enjoyable or tough places, the continuity of my life will be on. Unexpected things will occur no matter what, some of which are problems that might be absolutely complicated as its complexity could possibly causes us a lot of stress. The bigger the challenge is, the more time we need to solve. To cope and overcome these, not only our physical endurance is needed, but also the mental one, all of which would be gained from my actual life experiences.
If I encounter with huge issues that cannot be dealt at once, I will have to break them down, and then work on each task step by step, just like the way I did while I was cycling to Koh Kong. Sometimes, when I am dealing with the problems, which means the problems and I are staying very closely together in one box, I will not be able to see the whole picture of them. This makes it hard for me to choose which strategy is the best for the situation I am working with. Therefore, I need to take a break from the problems as this will give me a deeper and wiser perspective towards their nature.
By doing these, the impossibility became achievable for me. Surely, I know that the process of overcoming life challenges consumes much more time than eating a hamburger which was readily made and placed on the table for you. Yet, as long as we don’t give up, and keep moving forward, I believe that our life will be developed towards a point that we might have never imagined, and by then we will be astonished by how far we will have been through.
Cheers!
Traveling Isn’t My Solution to Stress
“When I get stressed, I travel. However, traveling is not a solution to my stress because the root cause of my stress is mostly from work. As soon as I come back to work, I still have to combat the same old problem which made me stressed from the start.”
You might ask a question like ‘why do I say that I like going away when things aren’t right if it is not an answer?’. Don’t get confused yet! Actually, the thing is traveling gives me a break I need. That break is very important since it benefits me in two ways.
First, separating myself from stressful place stops me from thinking too much about my work. Being on a trip, I am kind of busy enjoying the moment with people I am with. Especially, as I love taking photos, I always pay attention to my surrounding environment, trying to get the best memorable images. So, I don’t even have time to care about what happened at my workplace anymore. It is just as simple as that, for I can get lost in time while experiencing the grandeur of nature in front of me.
Second, it buys me some time to interact with new people. Think about it! Whenever I travel, I try to talk to local people, at least one person, asking about this and that related to their place even though I am not keen on talking much. Also, I frequently ask them about their life style and the famous spots in their area. People normally tell me about their challenges in life and how they deal with them. Thus, the interaction broadens my view of the world around me, which can challenge and improve my existing knowledge in a way that can be of significant help when I have to deal with problems.
As far as I have learned from life, all kinds of problems have their solutions. However, the way we, as a human-being, deal with them can be different based on reality of the situation we are in. What I am sure about is that a good solution takes time. The bigger the problem, the more time we need. So, my strategy when I am facing with any issues is to give myself time. I don’t skip or try to avoid the problems for good, which I cannot actually do, but I need a gap to truly understand the problems then come up with effective ways to surmount the obstacles. Meanwhile, it is essential to learn how to tackle them by listening to other people who have a lot more experiences in life too. The ideas will help if you put your mind in a neutral stage and keep in positivity and take out negativity.
“Stress is created by own thoughts. So, if we can change the way we think, we can simply control the stress level we have. However, the process of doing this takes time, so please give yourself time.” #PEACE
“My Comfort Zone”
“Find Your Own Comfort Zone!”
We normally receive countless advice from people that we should once in a while leave our comfort zone and explore the world to find our true selves. However, have we already understood what comfort zone means, or perhaps the definition itself is tremendously controversial that one’s defining is different from the others’.
One of my friends said that home is her definition of comfort zone. Staying in and practicing her routines, something she does regularly, are things she prefers to do most of her weekends. She believes that this promises comfort and safety. My opinion is somehow a little contrary to what she mentioned. I don’t know whether you have ever felt the same way, but it is true for me that whenever I stay in, my feelings are uneasy. I would get stressed and sometimes feel sick.
So, I don’t consider my bedroom as a cozy zone, and I constantly feel like going out and needing a naturally fresh air. For example, when I have some short spare time, I often hang out with friends at a café in town. Moreover, if I have a long holiday, like 3 days or more, I would choose to go away. The majority of people would use the term ‘leaving the comfort zone’ to represent this action.
However, I am a bit different. Going away is a path to reach my comfort zone.
You may question why I say this. It’s simple because comfort zone to me can be various places which are challenging, but they give me peace in my heart and mind. Normally, natural places with beautiful sceneries like islands, seas and mountains are my relaxing places. Thus, when I step out of the door of my house, I never think that I am leaving my comfort zone. Yet, I am going for a comfort zone.
This is one example of my leaving for a comfort zone:
I was on cycling excursion with a group of friends from Phnom Penh to Koh Kong in 2017. Actually, I had been a bit hesitated whether I should join or not because I had never had experiences on riding for long distance, and I was not physically strong enough. I was afraid that I would not make it. The trip didn’t seem comfortable, did it?
Paradoxically, the circumstance which I was in wasn’t good at all. I felt extremely stressed and really exhausted due to my work and family. Even when I was staying at home, my head could not relax. So, I eventually decided to take the challenge.
From this, I found my peaceful time with my mental calmness during my bike ride on a very long road. I forgot all of my anxiety and started to fill my energy. The sole concentration I had was on my goal – the place that I set to arrive each day.
From this, I have then learned many useful lessons in life. One of them is my idea on cycling. I came to understand that cycling does not depends on only our physical strength, but also commitment, endurance and direction. It is true that I was not well-trained cyclist, but I surely could do this job step by step. That means, during my trip, we rode around 100 kilometers a day, and we had to set out the direction for each day.
Despite the difficulty to see the road in the evening as there were not any light, I remember we were still cycling until 7 o’clock because we must arrive at out pinned point. This shows that we needed a very strong endurance which came out of our mind. Had we been lack of any of these mentioned points, we would have never reached the place we wanted to go.
As you can see, traveling does not give me only peace in my heart, but it also provides a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction. What is more important is that it often teaches me new lessons in life. The story is really not different since a combination of all of these together are truly essential to achieve our set goals.
To sum up this article, I kind of have two points to leave here. First, people have different perspectives on the meaning of comfort zone. Second, a place that can give you a physical comfort is not always able to produce a mental well-being for you. But what I am sure about is that there is only you who can find your own comfort zone.
“A Short Escape”
“Live with no excuses and travel with no regrets”
~ Oscar Wilde
The sun was setting down when I almost arrived there. I wish there was a time-machine in my hands to reverse one hour back in time. So, I could have taken some beautiful sunset photos too. Nevertheless, I did enjoy the view along the way. There were mountains in layering order which looks impressively cool and they reminded me of my last trip in which I was riding a bike to Koh Kong in that I saw very similar scenery as this.
I entered the farm, at which I was going to spend a night. It is located nor far away from Chrok La Eang resort. I could easily reach the resort by five-minute drive. At night, there was a campfire party in which we ate, drank and enjoyed the music together. The weather was getting colder, decreasing from 22oC to 19oC at eleven o’clock. It was going to get lower between midnight and morning so I had to cover myself with sweater and wear socks too.
It is so cheerful when you can sit at the campfire and listen to live music that you love. People were dancing and laughing together. It was almost twelve now, and I was thinking whether I should stay up for Mikey Way shooting or I should sleep. Eventually, I decided to sleep because I was a little drunk and tired too. Plus, I wanted to get up early to see the sunrise. Perhaps, I would be able to take a few photos.
The morning came, I woke up at 4. I was thinking that if had gone out, I would have got sick. So, then I went back to sleep because it was absolutely freezing. At 6 I finally got up and walked outside with my camera and tripod.
Wonderful! the mountains with morning fog were incredibly stunning. I was trying to shoot from my distance, but I, standing at lower land, was quite far from the view. I did not have any longer lens beside 70mm though. As a result, it was not easy to have the best-looking ones.
After breakfast, we headed off to the waterfall at Chrok La Eang. Before we were allowed to enter, we had to get a ticket. There were not many people when I first arrived. Actually, people say that it would be crowded if it were holiday. I spent around twenty minutes on going around there, and then I went up to see a bigger waterfall which is one kilometer away. While I was trekking, I took photos of those amazing views along the way. It was not as far as I had thought.
Personally, Chrok La Eang is a very nice place to visit. It is a quiet and peaceful place where you can relax with the calming sound of waterfall and enjoy the fantastic sceneries of trees and mountains. Moreover, you can swim in there because the water is clear and clean. Also, I noticed that there is a place where you can do foot massage with natural fish. You just need to put your feet down and wait for a luck in which a school of fish will come and do the massage for you. Many people do that. If you love camping and want to challenge yourself, perhaps you can do that at somewhere there which I am not really sure. But, I saw a group of people who went there with tents and camp stuff on their back when I approaching the waterfall at the top stage. Anyway, I suggest that you should ask for permission or clarification from local authority first before you decide to do that. Last but not least, if you are in love with talking photos of nature, it is the place you can find variety of angles and frames. You can take and make memories there.
“This was a quick retreating trip for me, and I really enjoyed it. I plan to go there again too, but for the next time I will surely go with my friends so it will be more exciting and memorable.“
Stacx's Domner 